My hockey league started again this weekend after a month off. We got a couple new players, which is always interesting – seeing how they fit into the lineup, etc. One new guy was referred to us by someone I play with on another team. It turns out he’s from Calgary and is a pretty good player. After the game, we were sitting around and talking and we discover that the town where I am from (Amherstburg, Ontario) is where his sister lives. …..After all.
I’m waiting… for my real life to begin
While being slammed at work, I watched some episodes of Scrubs. (some people listen to music, I watch TV… I dont’ so much watch it as ignore it. it’s like white noise to me.) And they have a really great soundtrack going on in the first couple seasons.. great music, cool interludes. I went to download a song off of iTunes (Overkill, by Colin Hay) and I thought I had some songs already by him. And as it turns out, I already had Overkill. Cool eh? One little bit of synergy.
Church and Solitude.
Yesterday in church, we started a really cool series called Detox – it’s about solitude and cleaning out your soul. Part of the message involved a 5 minute silent time, a time of meditation. It was really cool, and I remained in my seat, just looking at this series of candles. There were 3 candles on a triple holder and another, 4th one slightly behind and to my right. After service I took a picture and I’ll post it if I can.
But the thing that I found interesting was that all four candles were burnt in different amounts. The triple holder had 2 on each side that were partially burnt down inside, and the one in the raised center was burnt down almost all the way, with maybe an inch or so of wax left. The two outside ones had burned down in the center, so you couldn’t see the flame, only the light glow, through thick candle walls. The one on top had burned down almost all the way, and was nearly flat. You could also clearly see the flame. I was thinking about how when people decide to follow Christ, it’s like starting a flame burning inside them – and the longer, or more fierce the flame burns, the more of your walls and old self gets burned away – and once enough of it is gone, then the world can see that flame burning inside you.
Then I was struck with some other thoughts. There was a group of 3 candles who were on the same stand and all burning at different paces. Then, there was a single candle on the right and back a bit on it’s own stand – but that candle hadn’t burned down as far. That got me to thinking of whether being with other Christ-followers helps your flame to get better and bigger? Does being with others help you learn and live more fully in Christ?
Then I realized something. The candle that was on it’s own hadn’t burned down anywhere near as far as the other 3, but occasionally, you could still see the flame. I’ve heard from different people that often, when someone becomes a christ-follower, it inspires them, and they become (excuse the cliche)’On Fire’ for God. They are full of passion in their belief. This candle seemed to represent someone who was new to Christ but so full of belief and love and emotion that it still showed to people. Would their flame burn down inside and start working from within? would it get smaller until it had burned down the walls? Would it become invisible except for an almost unnoticeable glow until Jesus had done his work?
Lastly, I was struck by this thought, and it was possibly most like my own personal situation. What if I walked up there and blew out one of the candles? The candle would remain there, partially illuminated by the other candles near it, but not burning or progressing itself. The walls of the candle would stay the same. More importantly, the candle would still exist and contain the POTENTIAL to burn. All it takes is a spark or flame for it to continue it’s burn. If one candle near it suddenly flared up, it could potentially ignite it, or if someone picked up one of the other candles and held it close, it would reignite.
Right now I feel like that. I’m not ‘on fire’ with passion like I have been in the past. I feel like I’m drifting, and seeking. I know that the potential still exists within me, but I don’t feel like God is shaping me right now. I wonder among us, what kinds of things are like that slight breath, the lightest wind that can blow the flame out, until something comes along and sparks it again?
Has anybody got a match?
The Office
I love the Office, The show cracks me up. Steve Carell is both painful and hysterical at the same time. The beginning of the latest episode had me laughing out loud.
Kurt Vonnegut
When I was in Grade 12, I took an english speaking class. In high school, you had to take 5 english credits to graduate, so my ‘extra’ class had to be english writing or a ‘public speaking’ class. Every week for 20 weeks we had to write a one page speech and say it in front of the class. We also did stuff like a book report etc. Our novel study was on Flowers for Algernon and my friend Goat and I did it ‘together’ – while plagarism could be used here, we actually both worked on the whole thing together and turned it in seperately. We got busted, but since neither of us had actually copied it from the other, they couldn’t give us the standard punishment. We ended up having to do an individual novel study each, with different books. The book that I got was The Sirens of Titan by Kurt Vonnegut I found it unbelievably profound. I think it was the first time (since reading I Had Trouble In Getting To Solla Sollew) that I was really amazed by a book. It’s a series of stories about different people in different phases of their life. A soldier, A disabled man, etc, and at the end I finally realized that they were all about the same man, and it was like I had been struck by an idea (a 1.21 Gigawatt idea!). It was one of the most moving literary moments of my life. So today, I take a moment and remember the gift that Kurt Vonnegut gave me.
Later…
OK I went and read the summary of this book from Wikipedia and It’s nothing like what I remember. All that stuff is still true.. I just don’t know what book I’m thinking about.