I just got a call, my dad is out of surgery, and although it went well, he has another tumor in his chest, so that means chemo, and whatever other therapy is needed. I don’t know how I feel yet, I’m quivering internally, and trying hard to stem the tide that is pressuring to break out.

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My Mom & Dad are going to Toronto today to check into the hospital, get everything ready before he goes under the knife tomorrow. I’m feeling a lot better about it than I was yesterday. I came into work and as I got out of my car, the most wonderful smell hit my nose.. It was like cool, wet earth, the smell of nature, of fall, and of the contented sleepyness of the world, getting ready for winter.

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Well my dad goes in for surgery on wednesday. I’m kinda nervous, don’t know what’s going on, don’t know how I’m supposed to feel. I’m 3000 miles away and although they say that it’s safe, and everything looks good, I’m dying inside because of the “what if’s”. What if something goes wrong, and I never see him again? God, life isn’t supposed to be this way, I should be at home, with my brothers and sisters, not raging silently on my keyboard at work, tucked into my cubicle, not making waves in my cubefarm.

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I’m getting the hang of this template stuff. I’ve just about got the main page done, and the other ones will follow. I also want to set up 2 new blogs. stay tuned.

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i’ve been trying to create a template so i can migrate to mt but it’s more complicated than it looks. i’ve never done stylesheets etc etc, and given the hard core geek i am it’s hard to admit that i’m having trouble with something technical… i’ll get it eventually, but i don’t have the time to pour into what i need to do, let alone extras like my blog :/

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