life goes on

i’m really getting into riding the train, but not just for the obvious reasons. i’ve actually been thinking that maybe it would be interesting if i did a blog every day as i ride the train, about the people that i see, and my rambling musings about the places i pass, and stations etc. i like the naming of the stations along the light rail, some of them inspire interesting thoughts, and make me wonder where they came from.. of course, most of them are named after whatever place or street the station happens to be near (capitol, curtner, great america) but there are quite a few that are interesting. the one that i find possibly most intriguing is called ‘old ironsides’ and the name brings to my mind the vision of turn of the century trains, old steam engines, and railroads running all the way across the country.

today’s selection of people on the train is limited, there are only 4 other people in the car with me (i’m on a late train today – my hockey went late last night.) there is a sweet hispanic couple, in their mid-late thirties, and they’ve been on since downtown. they are cuddling and talking to each other, and look totally in love. they were holding hands on the platform as we changed at baypointe.

there’s an older man with a sheaf of papers wearing a jacket with some kind of regal-looking crest on the breast pocket. it makes me wonder if he’s part of a club, or group, or evil illuminati that is plotting to take over the world. j he looks tired and a little harried, so i would be more inclined to think that he’s on his way to a meeting, or possibly a job interview. there’s also a woman who got on a few stops ago and almost looks homeless, although of course i have no way to know. she’s wearing a battered purple baseball cap and carrying 3 big bags filled with varying things, clothes, a towel. she stares straight ahead, not looking around at all, talking under her breath to herself. it gives me a moment to pause and think about the sadness, and heartbreak that might have led someone to such a situation.. as i write this i’m struck by my thought patterns. i fly from one tangent to the next, taking little time for deep inspection of a single thought, instead, zooming recklessly from one to the next. i’m amazed at the number of muses that i can find to inspire me on a single train ride, but i know that i’m really avoiding what i am trying to do. since last week i’ve been mulling over in my head two different things that i want to write. i don’t know if i will actually blog one or both, or any, or if i will do it privately, but it’s something that i absolutely want to do. i want to write about my dad. i want to write something about him. about his life, who he was, what he did. i won’t be able to talk about why he did things, or from his point of view, although i’ve tried to get him to tell me several times over the last 4 or 5 years. the second thing that i want to write is a letter to my dad, telling him what he means to me, and how many things he still has to look forward to. i know that cancer is a big thing to have to fight, but he’s beaten it once, so who can tell what the future holds. i’ll try to post this when i get to work, and also to work on some other entries, i know i’ve been slacking since… oh, since i started my blog.. but that’s life.

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life goes on…

and with it comes tiredness, worry, fretting and even sadness. this past week has been long and tiring. there is a quote in hamlet that sometimes i think about:

“when sorrows come, they come not in single spies, but in battalions.”

how true this is.. it seems like when one thing happens, then a lot happen. on the positive side, we finally got a/c installed in our house, just in time for the swelter of this weekend (95+) in september. i thought it was supposed to be fall already.. frigid mornings, cool enough to need a sweater. well, soon enough i suppose. until i gain the strength to write more.. continue on with your lives, gentle readers, and think of me!

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barely holding together

it’s wednesday and i’m mired in another week of crap. this coff-ay is climing out of the cup and trying to attack my trackball *thwap* *thwap* “back in the mug you damned caffeine!” some times i try to explain that the coffee filter doesn’t have to be filled all the way to the top, it’s ok to leave some room in there, but the other engineers here don’t always get that. i’ve been kinda in the dumps for a couple weeks, thus the lack of any posting.. i’m also trying to finish some templates for mt, and write my transfer script so that i can move over to it. and lastly, i found out last night that my dad has lung cancer. *sigh*. if you’re religious, pray for us. otherwise, cross your fingers and hope that he comes through ok, and my family doesn’t crack :) thanks y’all.

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brewing your own blog

my blog is hosted on a server at home, using 100% home brewed software. i mostly did it as an exercise in scripting, because i’d been poking around with perl but didn’t know enough to really do much, and i needed a project. it’s worked out really well, but it’s not very flexible. for instance, i’ve wanted to keep an additional blog to do my journalling and reflections on my bible studies, but i’d really have to overhaul all the software. i installed movable type last week and am poking around with it, but it will take some time, since i need to hack up a script to output all my files into movable type format (not a big deal, but i don’t have the couple hours to put into it) and i also need to explore how to write some templates so that my blog doesn’t look horrendous. why should i switch to movable type? because one of the strongest assets anyone has is work that has already been done. i don’t want to re-invent the wheel, and after tinkering with mt, it looks like it will be really good for my purposes. welp, gotta run.

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monday crap.. on tuesday

it’s tuesday and feels like the worst monday i’ve had in a while. i’m so unmotivated, i really want to kill some co-workers, and i’m ticking off minutes. help me, dear god, and don’t make someone piss me off today.

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